So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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