Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
