yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
