member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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