Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Randomize
