i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
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He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
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Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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