I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
send nudes
from the living room?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize