She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
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Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
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But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.