I'm so fucking centered right now
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
This is the high leading the old right now
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?