yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
