I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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