How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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