is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I think I am morally bankrupt
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize