The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
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I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
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Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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