if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
