I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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