Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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