16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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