that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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