awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
