Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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