But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
look no pants
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
