If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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