so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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