I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
