I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
