with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
