"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
