No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
