just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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