Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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