are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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