You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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