Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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