There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
she told me i tasted like america
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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