I could have mohawked her pubes.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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