I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
