i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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