he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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