I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
