Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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