I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
