I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
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I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
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The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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