Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
