As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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