We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
