I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize