apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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