pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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