Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
