i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
