is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
