the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
